Why on Sunday morning?

Why is it I had to start my Sunday Morning by opening the Free Beacon.com site, and see this headline staring me in the face?

Feds Still Studying Why Lesbians Are Obese
Update: Total government funding now $2.87 million

Now then, I am old enough to understand that there are lots of loose lesbians running sitting around. I have seen many of them marrying on TV .... and I thoroughly understand how many of them are overweight.....    

But for the life of me, I cannot understand why the Federal government is taking our hard earned tax dollars out of our pockets (remember - the Gob'mint has no money except what it takes out of our wallets) and spends $2,870,000 of those tax dollars to find out why them folks is fat! 

Last time I checked, it was what you put on your fork that made you fat! Big mystery? Rumor has it that Chocolate Butter Fudge Ice Cream by the pint will do it too!

It certainly can't be self-hate--  I've seen their parades -- they're gay and they're proud!!