Ole' Pecoz noted on "Democratic Underground" Blog today that...

.....intentional flatulence is now officially banned in a North East Middle Schoool. Here's how they put it;

CAMDEN (Feb 1): The Merriam Webster Dictionary definition for flatulence is brief: "flatus expelled through the anus." And while it's a natural bodily function, it seems some Camden-Rockport Middle School eighth-grade boys are taking it to new heights and making a game of seeing who can expel the loudest and grossest flatus. According to this week's Fire Cracker school newsletter though, the joke's on the boys as the penalty for "intentional farting" is now a detention. "Strange, but true, thanks to a bunch of 8th grade boys, intentional farting has been banned from CRMS," the newsletter said. "It started out as a funny joke and eventually turned into a game. This is the first rule at CRMS that prevents the use of natural bodily functions. The penalty for intentional farting is a detention, so keep it to yourself!" According to a group of seventh-grade students milling around downtown following Friday's storm-related early release, the eighth-graders' escapades are well known in the school.

Well shucks, at first I just smiled at this story like you just did -- but then I got to thinkin'. The Camden-Rockport Middle School might just be on to somethin' here! Ole' Pecoz has read reports that one of the main causes for global warming is an excess of methane gas in the atmosphere and we know that the primary source of methane gas is belching, farting and rotting foods.
I reckon there is a zillion cows and zebras in the world just standing around belching and farting all day, and not much we can do about it. But if we could get Al Gorebot and the United Nations to make it illegal for human beings to perform these natural functions --- why, that'd do a hell of a lot more good than gettin' rid of our incandescent light bulbs!
Imagine a few bellies 'd swell up and such -- but we would be saving the planet, don't cha' know! They could make the statement "Pull my finger" a phrase punishable by 30 days detention in jail! Ain't no end to the laws they could pass globally, nationally, and locally!